Establishing Contact?

facepalm

There are times, when I go days without seeing any other adults other than maybe the few minutes I spend at the bus stop with some of the other neighborhood dads in the mornings. On Monday evenings I attend my son’s Cub Scout meetings and then Sunday, as a family we go to church. In between those days, it’s a crap shoot. It’s almost enough, after a while to make me go a bit stir crazy. My normal interaction with other adults is sadly, social media. I feel like a rat in a cage most days, and the options are very limited.

Right off the bat play dates are out. Not many stay at home moms want to have a play date when the parents of the kids their kids are playing with is a SAHD. And of the few of those that would be okay with it, I guarantee their husband’s wouldn’t be okay with it. I’ve even had an issue when a friend of mine got upset because I suggested his wife and I get together for play dates during the summer because she’s home all day with her kids, and she lives within walking distance.

Hanging out with friends after work is generally a no go. Most of my friends, well all of them, have kids of their own and after work, they want to spend time with their wife and kids. On weekends, it’s hard to hang with my friends because, like me, the weekends are the only time the whole family is together and they want to spend time with them. It can be frustrating.

So I’m out of options and ideas. All I want is to be able to have an adult conversation with another adult, rather than conversations about cartoons, toys, how random messes came about in the house, princesses, tea parties, and other random thoughts that pop up inside the mind of a 3 year old. Is that really too much to ask?

I guess I could always make a new friend, but I’m not that crazy just yet.

wilson

See this is something that the spouses of the stay at home parent don’t understand. Even though they slave to the grind all day, they get to interact with other adults. They get their coffee breaks through the day and they get a lunch break. I would kill to have a lunch break, where I could sit by myself and decompress. They get the commute home, something they take for granted, to decompress and listen to their books on tape, talk radio or their favorite radio station. So the next time they come and complain about their day be sure to remind them of this. They should consider themselves lucky to have all of the free time that they take for granted, that I would do anything to get.

So I’ll keep plugging away day by day, trying to keep my sanity in a world of princess pink and tea parties.

Wish me luck, I’m gonna need it.

 

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10 comments
Avantika Upadhyaya Sinha
Avantika Upadhyaya Sinha

What about those dads you see at the bus stop? I agree it's crazy... Some days I just give up and watch tv the whole day while my son is on the ipad! I figure it's better than me losing my head over a little tantrum cos of all the bottled up feelings .. go get some shows you love & watch them. We can discuss them then! :-)

Avantika Upadhyaya Sinha
Avantika Upadhyaya Sinha

Or get together with the other friends over the weekend with families. Win-win. Dads talk to dads, mums to mums & kids scream and run around.

Johnny Jochum
Johnny Jochum

I am a stay at home dad as well over two years now. I feel exactly the same way I miss talking to adults on a regular basis. I really enjoy your posts thanks for sharing!

Tammy Saunders Randall
Tammy Saunders Randall

Why not get a sitter you trust and get a job outside of the home? I had my son a little over 22 years ago and that was motivation to get a job. I found a job and went to work 2 weeks postpartum. I love my son but needed to keep my sanity.

Paul Schonenberger
Paul Schonenberger

We are due in July but I have no office builsing to escape to. I work from home.

Renee Cain
Renee Cain

Well I'm a single Mom so nobody here to tell me no and I have a crazy active 16 month old. I would loveplay date with anyone who's kid could keep up with mine! People are stupid to say no. And those husbands are not very trusting are they?

Cathy Hollerbach
Cathy Hollerbach

Here's another suggestion - go to Storytime at the library. I'm a librarian and we see a lot of SAHDs.

Debbie Stewart Reiter
Debbie Stewart Reiter

My husband works 2 weeks on/2 weeks off so I completely understand no adult contact. The weekends are especially tough cause it's kid talk/play from friday @ 3 till Monday @ 8! We live in the country so no neighbors. Personally I would prefer play dates with kids of sahd's!

Cathy Hollerbach
Cathy Hollerbach

My brother in law was a stay at home dad and he and I used to hang out all the time when our kids were little. My sister and my husband were fine with it because we were family. The kids are grown up now but those are great memories and we were a great support system for each other!

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